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 "Udderly Ridiculous" by Marti Ronemus

I promise what I'm about to tell you is true. But first, a little background. Around 3600 BC was the first mention of a "waterbed," a goat skin filled with sun-heated water. The peak of the waterbed's popularity hit some 5000 years later during the 1980s when one in five beds sold held liquid. (Briefly, there were attempts to use Jello instead of water, but we'll save that story for another day.)

Better technology knocked the waterbed off the market starting late 80s and that was the end of that.

Or was it? Not hardly. Believe it or not, the waterbed industry is thriving again... as bedding for COWS!! It turns out the beds are ideal for protecting cows' joints, and the bedding doesn't grow bacteria, unlike hay and woodchips. Jaw-dropping, isn't it?

I can't think of a bridge tie-in, so let's mooooo-ve right along and milk some hands for all they're worth. (Sorry.)

Question 1

  Your Hand
 A K 9 8 7
 3 2
 6 5 4
 J 5 4
 
Q: 1 - South:
SouthWestNorthEast
---1
?


 Your choice:
A: 1: C'mon, live a little! We are at the one-level, we would welcome a Spade lead. Most modern players will overcall with 7 to 17 pts, but remember, the lower your points, the better your suit should be.

Your result so far:
Open Question

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Spend a week combining a vacation and improving your bridge game. You’ll be playing the best bridge of your life. For details and locations,
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Question 2

  Your Hand
 4 3
 A K 9 8 7
 6 5 4
 J 5 4
 
Q: 2 - South:
SouthWestNorthEast
---1
?


 Your choice:
A: Pass: We don't have the money to buy the two-level. We like our suit, but...

Your result so far:
Open Question

Question 3

  Your Hand
 3 2
 A K 9 8 7
 6 5 4
 J 5 4
 
Q: 3 - South:
SouthWestNorthEast
PassPassPass1
?


 Your choice:
A: 2: Most would agree (but not all!) that a balancing bid is called for. We can't bear the thought of allowing "them" to play at the one-level. We would, if nothing else, welcome a Heart lead. Some would pass and leave the decision to Pard, but we want that lead.

Your result so far:
Open Question

Question 4

  Your Hand
 Q 9 8
 A 5 4
 K 8
 A Q 10 9 7
 
Q: 4 - South:
SouthWestNorthEast
--1 No-trumpPass
?


 Your choice:
A: 4 No-trump: This hand is somewhere in dream-land... do we have slam? Don't we? We might be a little light in points, but our Club suit makes up for it. We are asking Pard if he has anything extra in points or shape.

Your result so far:
Open Question

Question 5

  Your Hand
 A 6 5
 A 9 8
 K 9 8
 A K 4 3
 
Q: 5 - South:
SouthWestNorthEast
--1 No-trumpPass
?


 Your choice:
A: 6 No-trump: No reason to ask for Aces, is there? With our 18 pts, we have at least 33 pts. Pard's got to have all the Kings and other honors to scrape up a 1 NT opener. Just bid it, no need for Gerber or anything else.

Your result so far:
Open Question

Play this Hand

Now that you've bid five hands, let's see how your play goes.

Overall Results

Your results:   out of    Average: 

What next? You may enjoy playing our prepared hands series.
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